Updated: Sep 16, 2021
👉 Stop asking, waiting, or wishing...write your own Permission Slip.
What are you giving yourself permission to feel? What will your permission slips say?
Me, I'm giving myself permission to simply BE... to be with all of the “feels” that I'm feeling during this challenging time.
✔ I'm giving myself permission to want to cry...and need to cry if I choose.
✔ I'm giving myself permission to want to be scared...and feel scared if I choose.
✔ I'm giving myself permission to want to get more anxious...and feel more anxious if I choose.
Yesterday, I chose all of that.
✔ It looked like trying to garden and getting frustrated and breaking flower stems from not being gentle and patient.
✔ It looked like buying two bottles of rose instead of one.
✔ It looked like watching Netflix at 6 pm with an oooeyyy-goooey grilled cheese (dairy is the devil!) and all four pieces of my treasured See’s candy in one sitting.
I gave myself permission to be all up in my “feels” and not force moving through the emotional part of me that just didn’t want to be “emotionally mature and savvy” - for just a while. As I was conscious of all that I was doing, I was that much more clear that I was making choices - even when they weren’t serving me. And I was reminded about the power of “permission slips.” Brene Brown discusses these, and as a previous principal, I’m all too familiar with the power of the “permission slip.” When you combine the permission slip WITH “choosing”...you get EMPOWERMENT. When I am my empowered self, especially in times like this, I'm giving myself permission to take a deep breath and be able to choose differently. I'm giving myself permission to be more aware of what is happening now in the world and its impact on my thoughts, my emotions, and my be-ing. Yesterday was a really hard day...after being a really great day. Coming off of “presenter’s high,” I stopped in Lakeshore’s Trader Joe’s.
I was almost brought to tears by what I was feeling as an empath, by what I was feeling seeing us all wipe-down our baskets with extra diligence, seeing all the grabbing of what was left on the shelves. It looked apocalyptic...and it freaked me out. I gave myself permission to look a fellow stranger in the eyes and simply say, “This is scary.” He gave himself permission to hold my gaze and respond in solidarity with a gentle and simple, “I know.” As I was in line - a very long line - I could feel the tears welling up. And dammit, I was not going to have my breakdown over feeling all of this in Trader Joe’s.
I did what a resilient person does.
I took a few deep breaths and I called a life-line. I called my man. In him, I knew I could share what I was feeling and he would reassure me, just as he did the night before - the night that the NBA shut-down. We hang-up and I make a hard effort to reconnect to what brings me joy...so I leave the line to get flowers, lots of flowers. Now, I am home processing, feeling all of what is hard at this time for me. And I remember my own self-talk: “let yourself feel it, be in it for the time you need, and then re-align back to your empowered stance….make better choices about HOW you want to BE in this and how you want to support other to BE in this, without judgment, without condemnation...and with as much compassion as you can muster.”
With that, I write my permission slip to nurture myself and take things a bit slower - choosing to feel what I feel and giving myself FULL permission to do so.
What will your permission slips say?